It began in 2007 when I was on a tour to promote my worldwide bestseller, Thrive, in which I let the little people in on some of the secrets of the fabulously successful. I had just spent the morning in Washington with Hillary Clinton, before giving a lecture to several thousand entrepreneurs, when my phone rang inviting me to give a television talk in Seattle that evening. Even though I was as dog tired as only the world’s busiest and most important woman can be, I said yes. Back home in LA the following morning, tragedy struck. I fell over and slightly grazed my elbow.
“Help!” I wailed helplessly, while answering some very important emails on my BlackBerry. My daughter came running. “What’s the matter?” she said, looking very bored. “I’ve got Fomo.” “What’s that?” “It’s fear of missing out, you idiot. And it’s got so bad, I’m now not sleeping at all well, which is why I am so critically injured.”
On my way home from the ER, where a doctor applied a plaster to my life-threatening wounds, I resolved to write another book to help all the little people who might find themselves in the same situation. Well, obviously not exactly the same situation, as I was one of the world’s most successful businesswomen running an internationally famous website named modestly after myself, but as near to it as other people could realistically expect to get. And the book I was going to write was about sleep, because it was clear to me people weren’t getting nearly enough.
At first, I found it very hard to give myself permission to sleep, as I was under the impression that the world might literally stop spinning if I was not awake. “How am I going to make sure everyone keeps reading my modestly named website?” I wept to my therapist. “Perhaps you could carry on doing what you always do,” she replied helpfully. “Just get a load of people to supply the content for nothing. And when you wake up, there will be lots of people still reading your modestly named website.”
So this is my gift to all of you. Follow my advice and you can rise above mediocrity to just above mediocrity. First, though, I want to explain my extensive research into sleep. As far as scientists can tell, humans have always spent some of their lives asleep. This shows that it is very important for our survival. However, we haven’t always slept in the same way. In the early days, humans used to sleep outdoors or in a cave. Now people sleep in luxury, emperor-size beds with white cotton sheets with a thread count of 1,200. At least I do. So that shows people have changed their sleeping habits.
Now for the really scary bit. Not sleeping enough gives you cancer, Alzheimer’s and heart disease. Fact. According to research conducted by Professor Ken Snore of the University of Palm Springs, every person who is diagnosed with cancer, Alzheimer’s and heart disease has reported that at some point in their life they have felt a bit tired and rundown due to lack of sleep. That categorically proves a link between sleep and death. Doctor Doreen Doze of the Dunstable Sleep Laboratory has also conducted extensive clinical trials to prove that people who drive when they are tired are more likely to spontaneously combust.
Getting enough sleep is vital to our physical and spiritual wellbeing. Working too hard is one of the deadliest afflictions to hit American society. Literally every day, hundreds of thousands of people are dying by falling off buildings through tiredness. And for what? I have come to learn that less is sometimes more. When I’m trying to chat to a world leader, have lunch with the CEO of one of the world’s biggest tech companies (Bill, I’m thinking of you!), book my VIP ticket on the first Virgin Galactic flight and edit my modestly named website all at the same time, I’m letting myself down. The trick that I have learned is that I can now do all these things in my sleep. Aren’t I amazing?
People often say to me: “I’m not nearly as good as you at multitasking, Arianna. How can I fit some sleep into my hectic schedule?” To them, I always say: “It’s OK to nap.” That’s right. If you need a quick snooze, have one. That’s why I am calling for the UN to make it compulsory for all workplaces and schools to provide beds for their employees and students.
But now, forgive me. I am spent. Having given so much to you, I must give something back to myself. So I am going for a lie-down. Watch and learn. First I switch off my TV and phone, then I summon my little Peruvian friends to play some of their haunting melodies on their pan pipes. And If I’m still not asleep inside 10 minutes, I’ll just read this book.
Digested read, digested: The Huffington Four-Poster
